I am sitting in the bleachers of a high school football game. It's a gorgeous Colorado Saturday and I am surrounded by parents cheering sons onward. As a family law attorney I cant help but notice the obvious (to me anyway) custody and shared parenting vignettes playing out around me. I admire some and cringe at some. I am struck by the differences and I want to share them with you over the next few weeks and have you ponder with me.
There is Fran and Bob, divorced 10 years with a Varsity starter that we are all cheering about. They sit with another Mom in between them and talk around her to discuss tidbits about Connors performance... Is he hurt...? , Do you think he'll pick up 10 yards...? Did you bring an extra Gatorade, he forgot his? They don't touch or talk animatedly with each other as they do with the parents around them but clearly they have learned to keep their personal friction quiet enough to hear what's important at their son's football game: The cheering, the groaning and the yelling about his victories and his misses. And he is the far better for it. Putting our kids first at any of their events should be all of our priorities, divorced or not.
Stay tuned for more wisdom from the bleachers next week.
*in the interest of privacy all names are fictional
-April D. Jones