Carrie’s Regret About Her Children: “I Regret Leaving You” After The Divorce

SecretRegrets.com is a place to shout to the world the thing you don’t want anyone to know. It is safe and anonymous. That is why Carrie (not her real name) felt comfortable sharing her own regret on this site:

I regret leaving without you. No you were not abused, you were not neglected. But he was never the father you deserved. I had to get out, but will you ever understand why you had to stay? Will you believe I abandoned you there to “live a carefree life” the way he thinks I did? Will you understand every night, every minute of every day, I wanted you with me but didn’t want to uproot you from the only home you ever knew? I didn’t want you to see me suffer, cry, and worry about where I would be, where I would stay. Yes, things fell into place — my family has been a better support to me than

I deserved. But I didn’t know it would be this way. I didn’t want you to have to suffer with me … I regret that you may never understand that.– Your Mom, “Carrie,” Age 27

There have been many responses and opinions about Carrie’s regret. A number of people called her selfish for not taking her kids with her. Some say her kids would have grown stronger for having seen her struggle to get back on her feet. Others argue that she did the brave thing for putting her kids’ needs above her own. Whether applauded or criticized, Carrie did what she felt was best for her kids. The best anyone can do is to take the information at hand and make the most appropriate decision. And when the information changes, other options become available and new decisions can be made. In a follow-up interview, Carrie reported that she is seeking custody of her kids now that she can afford to give them the life she always wanted for them. Carrie’s full story can be found in the second volume of the bestselling SECRET REGRETS series, MOVING PAST YOUR PAST.


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