How to Have a Mindful Divorce

We’ve all heard the divorce horror stories. The ones where a spouse drained the couple’s bank account, racked up the credit cards, alienated the children, or drove the couple into bankruptcy. These types of stores abound, but that doesn’t mean that all divorces have a bad ending, or that your divorce story has to end the same way.

“Is it possible to achieve a mindful divorce?” Absolutely, but to have a mindful divorce, the spouses must be respectful and deliberate in their actions – not an impossible feat. We have found that divorces based on mutual respect and common sense are less stressful and especially beneficial when there are children involved.

Reducing Conflict in an Emotional Divorce

For most couples, divorce is hard. They thought they would be together forever, but something happened and now they are ending their marriage. Even when both spouses agree that the divorce is for the best, it doesn’t mean it isn’t going to affect them physically, emotionally, and of course financially.

By its nature, divorce is a highly emotional, life-changing event. It can affect a person’s appetite, their sleep, their job performance, their focus, overall well-being, and concentration. So, to reduce the conflict inherent to a divorce, the spouses are well-advised to remain calm, patient, and collected. They must control their anger and treat their spouse with dignity and respect during the divorce process, even if it’s extremely difficult.

Being Kind for the Kids’ Sake

The single most effective way to achieve a mindful divorce is to be respectful to your spouse. If you have children together, this is absolutely critical and it’s a game changer. If you can both refrain from attacking each other on social media, from badmouthing each other to the children, and speaking poorly of each other to anyone who asks about the divorce, you’ll be doing yourselves a huge favor.

Usually, children have the hardest time when their parents have a high-conflict divorce. But when their parents have open communication, say positive things about each other, reinforce how much they love their children, and encourage their children to have a strong, healthy relationship with the other parent, the children of divorce do much better.

If you can get your spouse to agree to a collaborate divorce, one built on a foundation of mutual respect, it should be a much smoother, less tumultuous process.

Related: Best Parenting Advice for Divorcing Spouses

To schedule a consultation with a Denver divorce attorney, call 303-799-8155 today.


The information on this website is for general information purposes only. Nothing on this site should be taken as legal advice for any individual case or situation. This information is not intended to create, and receipt or viewing does not constitute, an attorney-client relationship.

Our team includes attorneys licensed to practice in multiple states including April D. Jones in California, Patrick G. Barkman in Texas, the Cherokee Nation, the Northern District of Texas, and the District of Colorado (United States Court of Appeals 10th and 5th Circuit).